Sabrina sat on my lap, facing me, as she did every night.
I cupped her precious face in my hands saying in a firm but gentle voice, “Sabrina, look at me.”
Her big brown eyes locked with mine.
I looked at her intently for a minute.
And as I opened my mouth to speak the words I spoke to her every night, she broke into the most beautiful smile and started laughing…
The words had not yet escaped my lips yet she laughed in such a delicious way repeating, “You love me, you love me, you love me”!
I savored that moment though I knew our little ritual was forever changed.
So I asked, “Do I tell you too much that I love you?”
“Oh no, I love it! Don’t stop telling me Maman. But why do you love me so? Because I’m your daughter?”
It’s amazing what an extraordinary world a simple question can open! What a wonderful thing to ask “Why do you love me so?”
Truth be told I tell my daughters I love them every day, multiple times a day but her question made me stop and think. How often do I tell them, or any of the people in my life who make my day bright for that matter, why I love them? In fact, have I ever taken the time to answer that question for myself? Why do I love these people so?
On a basic level, yes, I love my girls because they are my daughters, and that love is truly unconditional. No matter how hard they may choose to test it it will not waiver. But beyond that, what is it about each one that is unique and makes my heart soar with the most profound and complete joy? What is it about them that fills me with a love so deep it hurts?
And so a beautiful journey began of self exploration, sharing and new ways to let the most precious people in my life know how much they really mean to me. It’s amazing how something so simple can have such a powerful impact! I have discovered that letting our children know WHY we love them as we do is not only a beautiful way to spend some quality time together, it is empowering and a marvelous way to instill self confidence.
Throughout the week I look for things that I can celebrate in and with my girls and my husband … Character traits they are showing that I admire… A decision they make that is commendable … time they have taken to do something thoughtful … Words they speak that touch me in a special way …
I may sit down with one of them for a peaceful moment, or catch them off guard and hug them tightly… slip a little note in a lunchbox out of the blue.. and let them know why it is that I love them so.
I love you because you brighten my day with your beautiful smile
I love you because you ask such interesting questions that lead me to new discoveries all the time
I love you because you look at everything with wonder and joy
I love you because you want to make people around you happy
I love you because you love to share your day with me
I love you because you are a good friend
I love you because you do your best at school
I love you because you help me keep the house inviting
I love you because you like to create new recipes with me
I love you because you are so creative
I love you because you have such a big heart and always think of others, how they feel and what they need.
I love you because you gasp at the awesome beauty of the sunset every night
I love you because of your persistence and how you never quit even when things are hard
I love you because of your honesty and integrity
I love you because you are not judgmental
I love you because you are quick to forgive
I love you because you’ve become such an independent and caring young woman
I love you because you are such a good listener
I love you because you were so brave in defending your friend today
I love you because…
What about you, have you ever taken the time to let your children know exactly WHY you love them? Is it the way they act, the things they say… what is it about them that makes your heart swell with the most beautiful love?
So super sweet <3 I truly love this. This would make a gift for our kids, right?
It does make a beautiful gift for our kids Lisa 🙂 And there are so many beautiful and creative ways you can share this with them. Through conversations of course but you can make little cards or a collage to put in their bedroom …
How sweet is she! Great list of reasons to love her, too!
Thank you Virginia! My three girls give me so many reasons to love them, I am truly blessed 🙂
Aww! This is such a sweet story. There is no love greater than a Mother’s Love 🙂
Amen! A mother’s love is truly bottomless
Yes. I like to start each day and end each day by saying something about them I am proud of and that I love them. And I also am a paranoid person… whenever we go on a long car trip I always start out by saying how much I love them.
That is beautiful Andrea. And I completely understand reminding them when you go on a long trip. I think that’s just being a loving mommy who knows how precious time is 🙂
Love it! So sweet!
Thank you Jennifer 🙂
This is SO sweet! 🙂 A mother’s love is like no other. <3
Amen Rachel! A mother’s love knows no boundaries, and keeps on growing as our children grow.
This is so so sweet. I need to write a post for my kids on why I love them!
Aww that is so special Melissa. I look forward to reading that post.
What a beautiful challenge! Tomorrow, I’m telling my kids why I love them. 🙂
Yeah Julie! I LOVE that! I’m so excited for you and your little ones 🙂
Beautiful post. I love that you have made it a habit to tell them you love them every night, even though you tell them other times, too. We do the same thing (“Mama loves you, Daddy loves you, and Jesus loves you.”) I want it to be the last thing they hear at night.
The “why” is also so important. And not just for our kids! I made my husband a book about why I love him 🙂
I agree with you completely Rebekah, I too want “I love you” to be the last they hear in the morning when I drop them off at school and every night when they go to bed. I LOVE that you made a book for your husband! What a beautiful and powerful idea. I’m going to do that for our anniversary which is in a few weeks. <3
We pass around a lot of I love yous at our house. The girls and I have a Trade Book where we write each other and I have started writing down the I love you because statements in there too!
That is so beautiful Beth! I love the book idea… it immortalizes those moments and I can just imagine how magical it must be to sit down and read through it as time goes by. I think I should start such a book for each of my girls… Could make a beautiful present for them when they leave for college 🙂
we say lots of I love yous in our home. I don’t remember many growing up so I want to make sure my kids know how much i love them
It’s so important to share those “I Love You”s isn’t it? Not to take that for granted. I’m sorry you didn’t hear many growing up and so proud of you for making your children grow up hearing it frequently.
This is a dear gift you’re giving with these thoughts of love. I adore this post. I say I love you all the time too!
Thank you Liz! It just feels so good to say “I love you” with purpose, not just as a thought in passing but taking a moment to really mean it and connect on a deeper level with the person you are sharing it right then and there.
I love this. Like you, I tell my children I love them every day, but I don’t think I’ve ever told them why I love them. Thanks for this.
You are most welcome Crystal. I can’t wait for you to start sharing your why’s with them. It’s such a powerful experience!
What a beautiful post. Yes, we need to cultivate the art of specifics while telling our little blessings how much we love them.
Amen Marina and thank you! It is such an empowering habit to get into!
This is very kind and every person needs to hear this regularly!
Thank you Trisha and yes, yes, yes… our little ones, our husbands, our parents and special friends… all need to hear why they have such a special place in our heart.
This is such a great idea and concept. I’m glad that you shared this precious moment with us. It’s something everyone can benefit from reading.
Thank you so much Crystal. I’m humbled that it has such a powerful impact.
That is SO sweet – I tell my kids I love them everyday as well, but I don’t think we go into WHY. That would probably be a good thing to tell them, especially as my girls are getting older!
They grow up so fast Krissy .. In a year my oldest will be off to college and I’m already feeling the void she will leave. I know she knows how much I love her but I want to make sure she knows exactly why and I want to tell her as much as I can while I can still hold her in my arms when I do.
I tell my daughter this stuff maybe too much…lol. She is the only child of an older mom, can you say spoiled 🙂
Oh Robin, I don’t think you can ever spoil your daughter by saying I love you too often. I’m sure she feels blessed beyond compared 🙂
Hi Valerie: I have no children, but your post applies to anyone. One’s spouse, a family member, friends, colleagues. We need to express ourselves more to the people we love and share details with them about WHY we love them as you have done. I did that awhile back with some of my gal pals and it was quite an enlightening and heartwarming experience.
Thank you Doreen. You are right, this applies to anyone we cherish. I’m so glad you did this with your girl friends. When we share the things we treasure about each other with each other we realize how blessed we really are and everyone feels empowered and humbled to be in such extraordinary company 🙂
Hi Valerie. I tell my son THAT I love him. but I tell him WHY I like and admire him so that he knows love is unconditional and does not depend on actions, behavior or attitude.
You make and excellent point Paul and I agree wholeheartedly that our children need to know that our love for them is unconditional. I remind my girls of that, especially when we talk about topics that are a bit more challenging and about choices they may choose to make as they become young adults with opinions of their own. I let them know that I LOVE the to the day I die no matter what. You’ve made me think that I may have to say “I love that you have a big heart” rather than “I love you because you have a big heart” as I remind then of the qualities I cherish in them. It is an important distinction to make. Have a blessed day!
I don’t have any children but I do have people in my life that I love and one in particular. Your post made me reflect as the question from your daughter made you. I am going to answer the unasked question before, if ever, it is asked. Thanks.
How beautiful Tim! It is an uplifting journey to go on as we discover the qualities in our loved ones that we admire and cherish we are reminded of how blessed we are to have them in our lives 🙂
hi valrie; your post made me think if i do this enough and of course th answer is no. thanks for writing a post that is poignant and challenging at th same time. we can never hear this message enough, max
You are most welcome Max and I am humbled by the response I have had from this post. We can never take it for granted that our children, spouses or other loved ones, know why it is that we cherish them so 🙂
This is beautiful. Can’t wait until I’m a mom to do these things. But in the meantime I’m spoil the nieces and tell them all the reasons why I love them.
What lucky little nieces you have! Enjoy this special time with them. Have a splendid day!